lördag 25 december 2010
lördag 18 december 2010
fredag 17 december 2010
Story about sister sarah Part One
Now I have got hold of a sister who I have known, through faceook. Alhamdulillah. I will call her sister Sarah (this is not her real name)
Sister Sarah and I start talk to each other over Facebook, and she has a lot to tell us and the world Inshallah on America, etc. That have happened in her life. Since it is part so I have asked her to write her story in several sections.
Sister Sarah is a American woman who has found Islam,,
Sister Sarah and I start talk to each other over Facebook, and she has a lot to tell us and the world Inshallah on America, etc. That have happened in her life. Since it is part so I have asked her to write her story in several sections.
Sister Sarah is a American woman who has found Islam,,
Alhamdulillah, but she had and have great trials.
I'm great honored to she has chosen me and that I may publish her story on my blog.
Love Meddie
I'm great honored to she has chosen me and that I may publish her story on my blog.
Love Meddie
Here is the first part:
How I Come In To Islam.
I was just a normal American girl. Looking for something different in life. I knew I wanted to be different from my family. I had a hard childhood when i growing up. I maybe saw my dad about once a year. My mom was always depressed because she had two marriages that failed, boy friends who would treat us kids bad. My sisters and I hated each other.
How I Come In To Islam.
I was just a normal American girl. Looking for something different in life. I knew I wanted to be different from my family. I had a hard childhood when i growing up. I maybe saw my dad about once a year. My mom was always depressed because she had two marriages that failed, boy friends who would treat us kids bad. My sisters and I hated each other.
Yup your typical American family. I never felt loved growing up. I decided when I was 10 to move in with my dad. My dad was gone all the time. So his fiancée and her two kids helped raised me. It was the first sense of family I have ever felt. She taught me a lot and actually loved me. I loved her more anything. My world came to an end when they decided to break up.
My dad moved back to his home state while I stayed behind to finish school. As soon as I was done school I had to move into a house with my dad’s new girl friend and her three kids and my sister. It was horrible. Talk about your Cinderella evil stop mom.
My dad moved back to his home state while I stayed behind to finish school. As soon as I was done school I had to move into a house with my dad’s new girl friend and her three kids and my sister. It was horrible. Talk about your Cinderella evil stop mom.
That was me. Mrs. Cinderella. I always prayed to god and knew there was a god. I loved him very much and he helped me not feel so alone between all the abuse and such. I wanted to move back with my mom but my father wouldn’t allow it. When I was 13 I wanted to kill myself. Life was so bad.
I always got told I am worthless and will never amount to anything. I believed it. I just kept praying and knew my life wouldn’t. Be like this forever. I worked extra hard in school and indulged myself with sports. I became caption of the varsity soccer team and was an honor role student. As soon as I hit 18 I moved in with my mom and I graduated high school early. It was so much better. I started working as a bar tender.
I made a tone of money doing it. I then met my husband and got married to him at 19. I had my wonderful son at 20. I finally got my family that I always wanted. I then became a Christian. Since my husband at the time his family was into the church and such. I was so happy that I got to learn more about God and come closer to him. I went to church every Sunday.
I always got told I am worthless and will never amount to anything. I believed it. I just kept praying and knew my life wouldn’t. Be like this forever. I worked extra hard in school and indulged myself with sports. I became caption of the varsity soccer team and was an honor role student. As soon as I hit 18 I moved in with my mom and I graduated high school early. It was so much better. I started working as a bar tender.
I made a tone of money doing it. I then met my husband and got married to him at 19. I had my wonderful son at 20. I finally got my family that I always wanted. I then became a Christian. Since my husband at the time his family was into the church and such. I was so happy that I got to learn more about God and come closer to him. I went to church every Sunday.
Went to bible studies and did as much as I can. Plus was a stay home mom. I had the best life in the world. But then something happened. I felt like I became further away from god. And so I went to my pastor and told him.
They all just told me to pray to Jesus everything would be fine. I kept trying and trying. I just couldn’t pray anymore! I felt like something had happened. I felt like I had a brick wall between god and I. My in laws kept telling my Jesus is the bridge to god. I thought I was doing something wrong. I tried everything. One night my husband woke up and saw my crying.
They all just told me to pray to Jesus everything would be fine. I kept trying and trying. I just couldn’t pray anymore! I felt like something had happened. I felt like I had a brick wall between god and I. My in laws kept telling my Jesus is the bridge to god. I thought I was doing something wrong. I tried everything. One night my husband woke up and saw my crying.
I told him there is something wrong I just can’t pray to Jesus. It was awful. Then last year 2009 it was around Christmas time. I had always had a friend from Egypt that I talked to online. I asked him if he was doing anything for Christmas. He told me no he didn’t because he was Muslim.
I asked him what is Muslim. He said he couldn’t explain it. So he gave me a website. It was to Sheikh Yusuf Este’s site. I only found an email address on it and wrote in email to him. I started becoming really troubled because for the first time I thought Christianity might not be right and there are other religions out there. I went to Google and typed in Islam.
And Alhamdulillah it sent me to a very reliable web site. The very first thing I read about Islam was the hell fire. It scared me so bad. I became so troubled. I kept reading on and this religion sounded great. Very close to mine yet so truthful and more in details about things that Christianity didn’t talk about. Two weeks passed. I couldn’t eat, or sleep. I became depressed. I kept asking god please don’t let me die until I find the truth.
I was so scared of dying. I needed answers and I didn’t hear any response from the sheik. So I went back to the website that my friend gave me and realized there was a website called chatislam.com. So I went there. And there was only a monitor in the room. He was about to leave be he sensed I really needed help. So he started answering my questions. Showed me lectures from Deed at.
I learned so much. I told him I could never wear hijab. He told me don’t worry about that now just embrace the truth. The rest will come later. I felt so relived. I knew this was the truth! So after three weeks of hard studying and comparing religions. I wanted to revert. But I wasn’t ready. I was going through a lot.
I asked him what is Muslim. He said he couldn’t explain it. So he gave me a website. It was to Sheikh Yusuf Este’s site. I only found an email address on it and wrote in email to him. I started becoming really troubled because for the first time I thought Christianity might not be right and there are other religions out there. I went to Google and typed in Islam.
And Alhamdulillah it sent me to a very reliable web site. The very first thing I read about Islam was the hell fire. It scared me so bad. I became so troubled. I kept reading on and this religion sounded great. Very close to mine yet so truthful and more in details about things that Christianity didn’t talk about. Two weeks passed. I couldn’t eat, or sleep. I became depressed. I kept asking god please don’t let me die until I find the truth.
I was so scared of dying. I needed answers and I didn’t hear any response from the sheik. So I went back to the website that my friend gave me and realized there was a website called chatislam.com. So I went there. And there was only a monitor in the room. He was about to leave be he sensed I really needed help. So he started answering my questions. Showed me lectures from Deed at.
I learned so much. I told him I could never wear hijab. He told me don’t worry about that now just embrace the truth. The rest will come later. I felt so relived. I knew this was the truth! So after three weeks of hard studying and comparing religions. I wanted to revert. But I wasn’t ready. I was going through a lot.
My husband’s family sent prayer chains all over the country to a bunch of different churches that I wouldn’t become Muslim.
They sent me out of state to talk to a bunch of knowledgeable teachers who just lied about Islam to get my so I wouldn’t revert.
I knew my husband wasn’t going to revert. Yet I knew I wanted my whole life for a family like this. But for my God was most important. So I was ready to revert, but I wasn’t ready to tell people. But I really didn’t want to die a Christian either. So a sister in Islam told me I could revert and keep it secret till I was ready to tell people.
I knew my husband wasn’t going to revert. Yet I knew I wanted my whole life for a family like this. But for my God was most important. So I was ready to revert, but I wasn’t ready to tell people. But I really didn’t want to die a Christian either. So a sister in Islam told me I could revert and keep it secret till I was ready to tell people.
So I reverted in chat Islam.
It was the most amazing feeling! So peaceful! So joyful! It was wonderful. For a few weeks I prayed in secret. I had already separated beds from my husband month ago. Then three weeks later I announced I am Muslim.
Alhamdulillah Allah guided me!!
ALLAH AKBAR!!
Next week see what happens next.
The testing’s and Trials Allah had put me through Alhamdulillah for everything.
Sister Sarah.
måndag 6 december 2010
lördag 20 november 2010
A comprehensive Fatwa considering the right of men on their wives and the right of the wives on their men: What are the rights of the husband and wife

A comprehensive Fatwa considering the right of men on their wives and the right of the wives on their men: What are the rights of the husband and what are the rights of the wife?
what are a wife's rights on her husband according the Quran and Sunnah? or what are a husbands duties to his wife and viceversa? From the Sunnah:
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to Hind bint ‘Utbah – the wife of Abu Sufyaan – who had complained that he did not spend on her: “Take what is sufficient for you and your children, on a reasonable basis.”
It was narrated that ‘Aa’ishah said: “Hind bint ‘Utbah, the wife of Abu Sufyaan, entered upon the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, Abu Sufyaan is a stingy man who does not spend enough on me and my children, except for what I take from his wealth without his knowledge. Is there any sin on me for doing that?’ The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, ‘Take from his wealth on a reasonable basis, only what is sufficient for you and your children.’” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5049; Muslim, 1714)
It was narrated from Jaabir that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said in his Farewell Sermon:
“Fear Allah concerning women! Verily you have taken them on the security of Allah, and intercourse with them has been made lawful unto you by words of Allah. You too have rights over them, and that they should not allow anyone to sit on your bed [i.e., not let them into the house] whom you do not like. But if they do that, you can chastise them but not severely. Their rights upon you are that you should provide them with food and clothing in a fitting manner” (Narrated by Muslim, 1218)
(c) Accommodation. This is also one of the wife’s rights, which means that her husband should prepare for her accommodation according to his means and ability. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Lodge them (the divorced women) where you dwell, according to your means” [al-Talaaq 65:6]
2. Non-financial rights
(i) Fair treatment of co-wives. One of the rights that a wife has over her husband is that she and her co-wives should be treated equally, if the husband has other wives, with regard to nights spent with them, spending and clothing.
(ii) Kind treatment. The husband must have a good attitude towards his wife and be kind to her, and offer her everything that may soften her heart towards him, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“and live with them honourably” [al-Nisaa’ 4:19]
“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable” [al-Baqarah 2:228]
From the Sunnah:
It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: ‘Be kind to women.’”(Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 3153; Muslim, 1468).
There follow examples of the kind treatment of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) towards his wives – for he is the best example:
1. It was narrated from Zaynab bint Abi Salamah that Umm Salamah said: “I got my menses when I was lying with the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) under a single woollen sheet. I slipped away and put on the clothes I usually wore for menstruation. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to me, ‘Have you got your menses?’ I said, ‘Yes.’ Then he called me and made me lie with him under the same sheet.”
She said: And she told me that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to kiss her when he was fasting, and the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and I used to do ghusl to cleanse ourselves from janaabah from one vessel.(Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 316; Muslim, 296)
2. It was narrated that ‘Urwah ibn al-Zubayr said: “ ‘Aa’ishah said: ‘By Allaah, I saw the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) standing at the door of my apartment when the Abyssinians were playing with their spears in the Mosque of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). He covered me with his cloak so that I could watch their games, then he stood there for my sake until I was the one who had had enough. So you should appreciate the fact that young girls like to have fun.’” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 443; Muslim, 892)
3. It was narrated from ‘Aa’ishah the Mother of the Believers (may Allaah be pleased with her) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to pray sitting down; he would recite Qur’aan when he was sitting down, then when there were thirty or forty aayahs left, he would stand up and recite them standing up. Then he did rukoo’, then sujood; then he would do likewise in the second rak’ah. When he had finished his prayer, he would look, and if I was awake he would talk with me, and if I was asleep he would lie down.
(Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1068)
(c) Not harming one’s wife.
This is one of the basic principles of Islam. Because harming others is haraam in the case of strangers, it is even more so in the case of harming one’s wife.
It was narrated from ‘Ubaadah ibn al-Saamit that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) ruled, “There should be no harming nor reciprocating harm.” (Narrated by Ibn Maajah,, 2340)
This hadeeth was classed as saheeh by Imaam Ahmad, al-Haakim, Ibn al-Salaah and others. See Khalaasat al-Badr al-Muneer, 2/438.
Among the things to which the Lawgiver drew attention in this matter is the prohibition of hitting or beating in a severe manner.
It was narrated from Jaabir that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said in his Farewell Sermon:
“Fear Allah concerning women! Verily you have taken them on the security of Allah, and intercourse with them has been made lawful unto you by words of Allah. You too have rights over them, and that they should not allow anyone to sit on your bed [i.e., not let them into the house] whom you do not like. But if they do that, you can chastise them but not severely. Their rights upon you are that you should provide them with food and clothing in a fitting manner” (Narrated by Muslim, 1218)
Secondly:
The husband’s rights over his wife.
The rights of the husband over his wife are among the greatest rights; indeed his rights over her are greater than her rights over him, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable, but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them [al-Baqarah 2:228]
al-Jassaas said: Allaah tells us in this aayah that each of the spouses has rights over the other, and that the husband has one particular right over his wife which she does not have over him.
Ibn al-‘Arabi said: this text states that he has some preference over her with regard to rights and duties of marriage.
These rights include:
(a) The obligation of obedience. Allaah has made the man a qawwaam (protector and maintainer) of the woman by commanding, directing and taking care of her, just as guardians take care of their charges, by virtue of the physical and mental faculties that Allaah has given only to men and the financial obligations that He has enjoined upon them. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allaah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means” [al-Nisaa’ 4:34]
‘Ali ibn Abi Talhah said, narrating from Ibn ‘Abbaas: “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women” means, they are in charge of them, i.e., she should obey him in matters of obedience that Allaah has enjoined upon her, and obey him by treating his family well and taking care of his wealth. This was the view of Muqaatil, al-Saddi and al-Dahhaak.(Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 1/492)
(b) Making herself available to her husband. One of the rights that the husband has over his wife is that he should be able to enjoy her (physically). If he marries a woman and she is able to have intercourse, she is obliged to submit herself to him according to the contract, if he asks her. That is after he gives her the immediate mahr, and gives her some time – two or three days, if she asks for that – to sort herself out, because that is something that she needs, and because that is not too long and is customary.
If a wife refuses to respond to her husband’s request for intercourse, she has done something haraam and has committed a major sin, unless she has a valid shar’i excuse such as menses, obligatory fasting, sickness, etc.
It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: ‘When a man calls his wife to his bed and she refuses, and he went to sleep angry with her, the angels will curse her until morning.’” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 3065; Muslim, 1436)
(c) Not admitting anyone whom the husband dislikes. One of the rights that the husband has over his wife is that she should not permit anyone whom he dislikes to enter his house.
It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “It is not permitted for a woman to fast when her husband is present without his permission, or to admit anyone into his house without his permission. And whatever she spends (in charity) of his wealth without his consent, ….” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 4899; Muslim, 1026)
It was narrated from Sulaymaan ibn ‘Amr ibn al-Ahwas: my father told me that he was present at the Farewell Pilgrimage (Hujjat al-Wadaa’) with the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). He [the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)] praised and glorified Allaah, then he preached a sermon and said: “Treat women kindly, for they are prisoners and you have no other power over them than that, if they are guilty of open lewdness, then refuse to share their beds, and hit them, but not severely. But if they return to obedience, (then) do not seek means (of annoyance) against them. You have rights over your women and your women have rights over you. Your rights over your women are that they should not let anyone whom you dislike sit on your bed and they should not let anyone whom you dislike enter your house. Their rights over you are that you should feed and clothe them well.”
(Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1163 – he said this is a saheeh hasan hadeeth. Also narrated by Ibn Maajah, 1851)
It was narrated that Jaabir said: [the Prophet] (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“Fear Allah concerning women! Verily you have taken them on the security of Allah, and intercourse with them has been made lawful unto you by words of Allah. You too have rights over them, and that they should not allow anyone to sit on your bed [i.e., not let them into the house] whom you do not like. But if they do that, you can chastise them but not severely. Their rights upon you are that you should provide them with food and clothing in a fitting manner” (Narrated by Muslim, 1218)
(d) Not going out of the house except with the husband’s permission. One of the rights of the husband over his wife is that she should not go out of the house except with his permission.
The Shaafa’is and Hanbalis said: she does not have the right to visit (even) her sick father except with the permission of her husband, and he has the right to prevent her from doing that… because obedience to the husband is obligatory, and it is not permitted to neglect an obligatory action for something that is not obligatory.
(e) Discipline. The husband has the right to discipline his wife if she disobeys him in something good, not if she disobeys him in something sinful, because Allaah has enjoined disciplining women by forsaking them in bed and by hitting them, when they do not obey.
The Hanafis mentioned four situations in which a husband is permitted to discipline his wife by hitting her. These are: not adorning herself when he wants her to; not responding when he calls her to bed and she is taahirah (pure, i.e., not menstruating); not praying; and going out of the house without his permission.
The evidence that it is permissible to discipline one's wife includes the aayahs (interpretation of the meaning):
“As to those women on whose part you see ill‑conduct, admonish them (first), (next) refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful)” [al-Nisaa’ 4:34]
“O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones” [al-Tahreem 66:6]
Ibn Katheer said:
Qutaadah said: you should command them to obey Allaah, and forbid them to disobey Allaah; you should be in charge of them in accordance with the command of Allaah, and instruct them to follow the commands of Allaah, and help them to do so. If you see any act of disobedience towards Allaah, then stop them from doing it and rebuke them for that.
This was also the view of al-Dahhaak and Muqaatil: that the duty of the Muslim is to teach his family, including his relatives and his slaves, that which Allaah has enjoined upon them and that which He has forbidden them. (Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 4/392)
(f) The wife serving her husband. There is a great deal of evidence (daleel) for this, some of which has been mentioned above.
Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah said:
She is obliged to serve her husband according to what is reasonable among people of similar standing. That varies according to circumstances: the way in which a Bedouin woman serves (her husband) will not be like the way of a town-dweller, and the way of a strong woman will not be like the way of a weak woman. (al-Fataawa al-Kubraa, 4/561)
(g) Submitting herself to him. Once the conditions of the marriage-contract have been fulfilled and it is valid, then the woman is obliged to submit herself to her husband and allow him to enjoy her (physically), because once the contract is completed, he is allowed in return to enjoy her, and the wife is entitled to the compensation which is the mahr.
(h) The wife should treat her husband in a good manner, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) to what is reasonable” [al-Baqarah 2:228]
Al-Qurtubi said:
It was also narrated from him – i.e., Ibn ‘Abbaas – that this means: they have the right to good companionship and kind and reasonable treatment from their husbands just as they are obliged to obey the commands of their husbands.
And it was said that they have the right that their husbands should not harm them, and their husbands have a similar right over them. This was the view of al-Tabari.
Ibn Zayd said: You should fear Allaah concerning them just as they should fear Allaah concerning you.
The meanings are similar, and the aayah includes all of that in the rights and duties of marriage.(Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 3/123-124)
And Allaah knows best.
http://www.islam-qa.com/en/ref/10680/condition in the marriage not to marry another woman
that in the rights and duties of marriage.(Tafseer al-Qurtubi, 3/123-124)
And Allaah knows best.
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